Tuesday, October 29, 2024

Nightmares (Week 8)

 


We're at the midway point of the season and it got real spooky out there. National TE day ended with damn near every tight end going crazy. The witching hour was at full peak. Absolutely gut wrenching losses were had by many. Somehow, 11th place is only 3 games removed from playoff contention with only 2 wins. It's still anybody's game. Let's get into what we all came here to read. 


This Team Iz Kang 112.50 vs Team DQ 166.10

At one point in the season, you had Baker Mayfield going crazy and Love looking like the new hailed Packer. This week left you with a lot of pain though.  Love going out in the middle of the game hurts. Kmet being one of the only TEs that didn't score a TD hurts. Leaving Tracy on the bench for Chubba Hubba hurts. You're chances at making the playoffs are already "The S, the L, the I, the M" (112 reference). Every choice counts moving forward. Don't be yourself. 

Congratulations on highest point total this week. Looks like that intentional punt last week was worth it. Almost your entire roster went crazy, with multiple players on your bench even going for 20+ points. I still can't figure out if you're really avoiding the champ curse or if it's the fact you played Gordon. Either way good win this week. 

Saved by the Dell 120.30 vs The Syndicate 147.50

Easy come, easy go. Just when you got your first win, then this shit happens. Caleb Williams comes out the bye like a scrub and makes DJ Moore get on the struggle bus with him. Then, with most your players out, you're forced to start the RB of greatness past Dalvin Cook. To add insult to injury, McConkey goes for 2 TDs on your bench. Good grief Charlie Brown. You might officially be out of the playoffs. 

Congrats on another victory thanks to the TD vulturing Jalen Hurts and WR nobody heard of til last week, Cedric Tillman. This season, you've made quite a habit of winning games with your back against the wall. Your bench was full of O's and you got the win anyway. You're still firmly in the playoffs hunt, so if you can avoid an injury or two, you can make it. Stay focused.

Get off my Dak 126.25 vs Looking at the Man in Jahmyr 127.35

1 point losses always hurt. They hurt because of the regret and the lasting effects of the start em sit em dilemma. Legette getting a TD before Allen this week with baby boy Bryce at QB? Mostert running like last year? Doubt has a way of seeping into the mind and corrupting well thought out plans. Hopefully it won't corrupt your decisions for next week. You're starting to fall into the danger zone of standings. You're not in good company. Look at who your neighbors (Nabers?) are. 

On the flip side, getting a 1 pt victory sometimes feels better than a blowout. Making your opponent sick with envy knowing they could've won if they had just one more catch for 3 yds is one of the greatest joys of this game. The student has become the teacher in this moment. Bask in this feeling and send subliminal shots to him all week after you were interrogated for a manly trade. You earned it this season. 

Machine Gun Kelce 133.85 vs Your Chubby White Nabers 159.75

When Calvin Ridley had 100 yds in the first half of the game, I thought your team was finally turning around. Without Metcalf your team was pulling out all the stops, and even Travis Kelce was getting in on the action. It was all good til Sunday night though. Then the dreams turned to nightmares as Adam put together a desperation surge. We'll see if you'll be active this week in the chat after this loss. 

Second win of the season and a strong one at that. Lamb showed up when you needed him most. You didn't even need Alec Pierce to catch a 60 yd TD to do it. Right now you, Gordon, and Quis are playing hot potato to figure who's coming in 11th. This might be the start of a surge out of that position. Keep going.

I like to Marv it Marv it 163.85 vs Django Achaned 165.60

Despite how other people probably felt, this was matchup of the week. It was commendable to watch you fight til the bitter end. That 1pm witching hour surge you had was crazy. Your team might've scored 4 tds within a 3 minute timeframe. But like DA GAWD, you were severely let down by Caleb Williams. Even worse, Kyler would've got you the win. The only bright spot is that the "points for" column still matters in the long run. Your playoff position hangs in the balance.

Juan, you and your buddy must've pulled out all the stops for this weekend. With one player left to get the victory, you went from sniping to trophy picture. That confidence transferred through to Pickens when he caught a bomb to seal the deal. Congrats on the victory, but Da GAWD saw that YOU posted the diss video. Colluding on Da GAWD to blemish an otherwise perfect season won't be unpunished. Hope the trip was worth it. 

Wilson! 134.85 vs Da GAWD Al Gaib 127.10

On Sunday, while Da GAWD was home and sick with nothing to do but watch football, it dawned on me what happened. You and your buddy decided to voodoo your ways to victory. By sacrificing a Giants win, all your dreams would come true. Both of you got victories when there shouldn't have been one. Garrett Wilson puts up season high numbers with ANOTHER wr there? Taylor gets his TD while hurts vultures 2? I bet you feel great knowing you prevented the perfect season. Just know that I wish NOTHING more than to see you in the playoffs. I'm rooting for you from here on out. 

This was Shorty Sunday

Last week, I inadvertently asked to be humbled and here I am. This is the part of the movie when Luke loses his hand and realized his Dad is Darth Vader. This is when the Atredies army is reduced to ruin. When Simba starts the Hakuna Matata journey. 

I took Monday to really feel the feels of this loss. I see why Tom Brady would give up 2 rings to get the 1 undefeated ring. I contemplated what else is there to play for. I asked co-workers "how do I come to terms with these mortal feelings?". At one point, all I could think about was that it was all a dream and never happened OR that I wish I had a time machine (but to win the lottery but to keep an undefeated fantasy season). 

The perfect season may be gone, but a dominating one is still here. Now it's time for the climb back. 

#Amen

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