After a grueling regular season full of injuries, sickness and outright mayhem, you've made it to the next level - the fantasy playoffs (without DA GAWD). Four teams faced off to determine if they were worthy of hoisting the trophy at the end of 2020. Many people were lucky to correct course and get to the playoffs, unfortunately someone has to win and someone has to lose. Win or die. Drip or drown. Let's see how it all turned out.
Los Lobos 128.15 vs Philip on my Chubb 144.90
After a season full of wrong QB starts and anxiety riddled decisions, you made the playoffs. I was proud of how you got two T. Hill's in your lineup to get you to the promised land. Da GAWD was counting on you to take out the reigning champ and you almost succeeded. You came out the gates hot with David Montgomery putting together a solid performance. Every one of your players was admirable and showed up. But by the afternoon, Devante Parker managed to crucify you. I don't know how much it haunts you when MVS with 20 pts on the bench would've sealed a victory and allowed you to advance. Or worse, the disconnects between Andrews and Jackson for 50 points (is Andrew Jackson on the 50 dollar bill?) I don't want to think of that anguish. At the very least, you turned your season around and made it this far so you can't be mad at that. Maybe next year you'll hoist the trophy while surrounded by a bunch of twerkin thots, who's asses make waves in a jacuzzi filled with Moet. Until then, good season.
A wise man knows not to have a lot of enemies. The friction of constant conflict is a distraction in life and left unchecked can end up being what subtracts him from life. If possible, all enemies must be eliminated. With that said, you managed to eliminate another enemy despite your stable of backs being decimated. Devante held you down but the real stars of this week are your defense and kicker. Somehow in this world, a player like Blankenship steps foot in the same arenas as DK Metcalf. Having a combined 26 points from those two positions is a welcome gift. Let's just see if you still got the drip for Week 15.
A Team Had No Chance 124.65 vs falseProfits 176.50
Jesus, you fought valiantly all season and barely had Kenny Gollady or Chris Godwin play. You hustled. You bravely started Cam Akers and it looked like you had a fighting chance on Thursday. When Gerald magically granted you a DHop as your third wish, it breathed new life into your team and you escaped the fate of the rest of us at the bottom of fantasy football. But you could only go so far. Robert Woods and Justin Jefferson were simply no match for Adam's onslaught. Maybe if DA GAWD had your spot, this would've been a different outcome (clearly because I had MONSTER FUCKING WEEK). All's well that ends well I suppose. You made the playoffs when you didn't think you could. You evaded covid ridden Florida. Count your blessings, we'll celebrate your comeback into the playoffs with a proper funeral.
There was never a doubt in my mind how this game would go while you doubted yourself Adam. As prophesized, DA GAWD is looking beyond what your mortal eyes will see. Last time DA GAWD won a chip, he predicted a chip for Adam and then followed up with having the season of all seasons. This is but the first step in the multifaceted approach back to glory. Like 2017, a RB you had waited all season to erupt finally did and this time its Austin Ekeler. You had almost every player perform how they should perform each week. We even have a Hollywood resurgence on our hands. Bask in this glory for only a moment because you still have more of Da LAWD's work to do next week. Congrats on the win my unknowing accomplice.
Here we are in Week 12 and 2020 hasn't let up on its onslaught of catastrophe and mayhem. One of this Week's game's has been postponed all the way to Wednesday and complicated everyone's start em sit ems. We're in unprecedented times for the league and only the strong survive. With only 1 week left to determine playoff spots, its do or die time. Let's see how well everyone is positioned overcome the obstacles laid before them.
Kamaravirus 108.80 vs Pfizer 145.50
I'm really struggling to understand what's going on here Juan. You're spiraling out of control and your voodoo lineup is turning from blessing to curse. In Week 7's recap for Ian, we roasted him for starting Cam Newton and you chimed in with "lemon head, deady dead". But now you start him? This mentality is why we have "caution hot" on coffee cups. You had to know this team didn't have the stamina to go the distance. The highest pedigree names you have on the squad are Kamara and Kelce. Instead of chasing those parlays that Quis keeps selling you, its time to get down to business or you'll end up like Eddie. Cut off a goats head and spill it on your phone for good luck because things might get tragic really soon and you need all the help you can get.
Jesus, way to beat the fuckin' odds. With your playoff hopes on the line and facing off against 2nd place, I'm sure it was a daunting task. At some point during Thanksgiving, I saw Watson look through the cameras and say, "This one's for Jesus". Despite a no-show from Jonnu Smith, the rest of your team showed up like you were the Gipper that everyone talks about doing stuff for. You even showed some life on the bench with a Cam Akers TD (take notes on which Cam to start Juan). Great work this week, I hope you make the playoffs after so many set backs. You're a true overcomer.
Green Eggs and DAMN 100.60 vs ShuTheBuCUp 132.05
Yuck. Eddie, I can't believe this is the team that you've turned into after such a promising start of the season. Sitting your #1 overall pick for Brian Hill.....from the Julio-less Falcons? I can't imagine the turmoil you're going through. You play against your friend who had Leveon Bell, who then got traded to the team that your #1 pick is on, and he has managed to siphon carries away from him. Ugh. At least Evan Engram finally showed up. It looks like your playoff hopes are just about over, but I won't count you out just yet. You still got players like Deebo Samuel that can ball on your bench and you might just start em. Such a pity.
Another solid win for a commanding first place lead. Younghoe out here putting in that work and you just continue to steamroll your opponents. It makes sense that during an unprecedented season, an unprecedented GM would rise in the ranks towards Olympus. Hector, congrats on beating your friend twice and letting him know who wears the pants in the relationship. Deep down, I still hope the season is cancelled, but I also want you to lose in the Semifinals. I'll figure out how I feel later. Until then, keep winning.
Samuel Lamar Jackson 115.35 vs Philip on my Chubb 133.95
Yuck. Zeke coming through with a pitiful 2.9 points like he's some 4th string rb that you had to start in desperation instead of the "stud" you thought you traded for. If I were a salesman, you'd be my target audience. I got a Sou Sou investment group lined up whenever you're ready. At least Amari Cooper showed up and helped get you over 100 points. Even though there's one more week, your season of trying to escape the loser tax dungeon is over. If you start setting aside 5 10 dollars a month now, you won't even feel the loser tax, the bet with Hector, or your bet with me. At the very least, thanks for keeping the chat lively even though your team was dead.
Beating up on Gerald like its Week 1 all over again huh? Another solid win and you've secured your place in the playoffs. Even though Fuller didn't finish the season (yet again) it looks like he did more than enough to salvage your team's wrecked RB situation. You got another week to get some health on your side for the playoffs and luckily you've got a stable of backs that can get you there. If they don't get healthy, you might be stuck pushing them in for a TD yourself. But if they're all healthy, you might be kicking yourself starting the wrong ones. Good luck and good win.
falseProfits 160.60 vs It's Gonna Ertz 148.70*
Seeing into the future isn't always glitz and glam. Sometimes you see disappointment and heartache and there's nothing you can do to fix it. You really came out swinging this week Trav and had several players step up - especially Wayne Gallman and ex-Eagle Nelson Agholor. But when I separated the right and left hemispheres in my brain and witnessed your loss, it was sad to see Juju eat into Claypool's hot streak. Dionte Johnson will start off giving you a glimmer of hope with a solid TD and 65 yds while Claypool will have 60 scoreless yards. It will be admirable, but JuJu will get the bulk of the love as he revels in winning against a recently ravaged division rival. It was a good run Trav and you can still make the playoffs under the right circumstances.
Adam, its nice to see you coming back to form after some ho-hum seasons. Your team is healthy at just the right time and this reminds of the season where you came back to win after starting slow. I think that was the first Todd Gurley year. Anyway, great win this week with Antonio Gibson putting in a Derrick Henry type day and getting real production from Ekeler after waiting MONTHS for him to come back. You held strong and were rewarded. The perseverance is noticed and if there's anyone that I could "settle" for allowing to have the trophy it would be this squad. You have been given Da Blessing.
Easy Drake Oven 143.05 vs Los Lobos 204.20
How many times this season have you seen over 200 points against you? Honestly, I don't know how you cope with all the bad luck that comes your way. You managed to face off against Tyreek Hill in 2 leagues in the week he goes ballistic. And even though your team, yet again, would have beat over half the league, you manage to play the one team that would annihilate you. Ouch. At least Gordon and Gerald lost so you won't be paying any loser tax. But is that better than having the dark cloud of bad luck around your team all season? Here's to hoping that in some alternate league universe, there's a Shorty that's dominating his league while yawning his way to a chip and talking all the smack along the way in WhensApp.
Well look what we have here. After dropping Cam Newton and abandoning Drew Brees, it looks like Ian has found a new Saint QB to solve his start em sit em woes. Not only has his QB situation been solved, but the Cheetah set FLAMES to his opponent. At almost every level, players showed up seemingly from nowhere and allowed Lobos to get over 200 points and establish highest total of the week. Hanging on to your playoff spot by a thread, this was the type of win you needed since those points will help buffer any late season heroics by others. You're not out of the woods yet, but you can see the clearing. Good win.
This Team Iz Paying the Loser Tax 127.50 vs DA GAWD 127.95
This week, I was in shock that you decided to start both Trey Burton AND TY Hilton. Losing CMC most of the year had to hurt and the fact that you drafted poorly really showed up. Don't blame anyone else for this tax, because it all started in September. I almost gave this win away to you by leaving Swift in the lineup. But because you hate winning, you decided to start the WR that didn't even have a QB over SEVERAL viable options that would have easily been better. I hope this season was a learning experience and you take this knowledge and dominate somewhere in the G leagues. Work your way back up to playing in the Thunderdome that is the Game of Throws.
What a feeling to overcome the odds and get that last catch in the dying seconds so that I can at least claim Gerald's bet. There was so much worry after having several players out and with Covid and pulling hammys. Looks like my luck vs Gordon's luck will prevail even when the playoffs seem out of reach. One more week left and then we're in the playoffs. The energy never dies when you're a overcomer. Hope everyone makes it count.
This week, Yahoo decided to call our matchups "Rivalry Week". I wouldn't call it rivalry week, but it was certainly an important week. With only a few games left, there's an intense battle for the last 3 playoff spots amongst 6 teams. Every win and loss matters going forward. Every point matters going forward. Let's see how much closer or further away everyone got to their dreams of battling for championship glory.
Kamaravirus 93.30 vs Pfizer 133.70
Juan, all season you've been getting production from waiver wire warriors but the luck ran out this week. Now its back to reality, oh, there goes Ka'imi, Baltimore D choked and getting 100 points wasn't easy. Going from Kelce to 0 points at TE hopefully put some empathy in your heart for the rest of us. Curtis Samuel being who we thought he is and AJ Brown dropping that TD had to sting. This week, your team reminded me of Shorty's LightsKamaraAction where he ONLY had Kamara. Lucky for you, you still have 8 wins, but that playoff bye week might be in danger without some quality players. Don't lose yourself in this quest for the chip.
Looks like we found the vaccine we've been waiting for all season. Despite Brees leaving the game with a deflated lung, Josh Jacobs and MVS breathed new life into Lobos. You were in must win territory and you succeeded. At one point, I really questioned starting Gronk over Mark Andrews, but it worked out anyway. All of this success without Tyreek Hill to lead the way. Bravo. With only 3 games left, you still have a shot, but you'll be cycling through the waivers looking for a halfway decent QB - the bane of your existence all season. Good luck.
Samuel Lamara Jackson 103.25 vs A Team Has No Zeke 112.15
One week removed from one of the dumbest trades in league history and it immediately came back to bite you Gerald. Had Jesus been stuck with bye week Zeke, he would've had to start Justin Jefferson for 22 points while you would've had Dhop at 28 points. You would've started Dhop over Fitz and gotten a win to save you from last place. But alas, here we are. I hope you take a long, somber, disappointing look in the mirror and realize you lost after showing up to the draft without 2 buttons. Next draft, you're relegated to polos. Matter of fact, just throw out all of your buttoned shirts because you literally have as many wins as you had buttons undone. SMH
Jesus, while you got this win, your team SEVERELY underperformed. I think we both know you weren't too happy by 4 pm and just ignored the games. I bet you had dreams of grandeur and playoff hopes after seeing the donut from Jimmy Graham on Monday night. But DA GAWD thinks your playoff hopes playout like a romcom where the guy lies about being rich and the girl finds out and she leaves him. That's week 13. Until then, keep hope alive and thank the Amboy education system that you managed to get DHop at just the right time in the season.
It's Gonna Ertz 103.20 vs ShuTheBUCup 124.75
I'm sure this is not how you intended this matchup to go Trav. But honestly, you had to know things aren't good for your team when both your starter and handcuff are on the bench. Starting Wayne Gallman and AP at RB1 and RB2 has got to be sickening. The dynamic duo let you down once again with Metcalf and Mr. Wilson getting shut down by Sir Sassy himself Jalen Ramsey. . You're currently within spitting distance of the playoffs but I think this is as close as it gets until Chris Carson comes back. It might be time to get on the good foot and just focus on that rehab; it'll be a better comeback story than your team making the playoffs.
Well look who's managed to achieve first place after years of mediocrity. You had yourself an easy outing against Trav while you're players just clocked in for another ho-hum win. I'm sure you looking at the chat on the regular now, waiting for an opportunity to assert your dominance. But at the same time, I bet there's still doubt in your mind so you hold everything back for that day you're in the chip. For your sake, I really hope you get that 1st round bye. On draft day, you looked worried, but maybe that's just your concentration face when making good decisions. Congrats on securing another win, I have nothing left to say until you lose.
This Team Iz America 115.00 vs Philip on my Chubb 133.25
Ouch. Between you and Shorty, I don't know who has worse luck. After having a moment in the sun with CMC, you're right back to where you were for weeks. To top it off, the rest of your team came to play and could've beaten a few other teams this week. You even had JD McKissic perform like WR in the RB slot. It just wasn't enough. With 3 games left, you're only goal now is to avoid the loser tax. It will be a battle of bad luck will's between you and Shorty. Better hope Mahomes can change things around for you next week because you're just not doing enough when you start Trey Burton.
After trolling Gordon all week that CMC wouldn't play, you got an easy win lead by last week's stinker Tom Brady. A broken clock is right twice a day right? I'm starting to notice the trend where you seem to win when you literally have no other options. With palyers either hurt or on bye, you only start healthy players. Not only do they play, but they end up putting together enough points for the win. Go figure. While you're solidly in the playoffs right now, anything can happen in the next 3 weeks. Maybe all your players are healthy and you have some that ball on the bench. Maybe other teams start going on a scoring streak. Either way congrats on the win.
Easy Drake Oven 129.60 vs falseProfits 145.45
You are officially bad luck incarnate. All season you've played highest point totals of the week, but this one hurts in hilarious fashion. First, I wonder what ladder you walked under while starting Philip Lindsay. You do know he's been losing touches each week right? You had a VERY viable Kenyan Drake on your bench. THEN I see you hulk smashed 7 mirrors before starting Robby Anderson against a good TB defense instead of newly acquired target hog Antonio Brown. And to top it all off, the bad luck of all bad lucks, Nick Chubb runs all the way to the end-zone and decides not to score. YIKES. I want to be the first to say sorry that we didn't reach out to ensure you weren't about to jump off a cliff. At least there's 3 games left.
Adam, I gotta say I'm getting pretty nervous with your team peaking at just the right time. Kyler Murray is firing on all cylinders and you're just waiting to get MT going. On top of that, Ekeler can come back at any moment to save you from starting Bernard. Between you and me, I want you to make the playoffs. But Week 11 just ain't where I want you start getting more wins. I'd rather see you in Week 15 when my team can be fully operational. Until then, great work getting the highest point total of the week, and dropping Shorty down a notch.
Green eggs and SAM 98.25 vs DA GAWD 126.35
Well Eddie, you've been up and down all season. Its not like you made any bad decisions. Who would've thought Boston Scott vultured touches and yards away from Miles Sanders? Evan Engram came up short and Jerrick McKinnon simply hasn't ever been the answer since being AP's backup in Minnesota. Sure, CEH was on bye, but this roster outside of J-Herbo just doesn't have the firepower to keep you afloat. I honestly feel bad your season has come to this after losing Dak. For all I know, those 3 yards you lost by last year might be the closest you'll ever get to touching the chip in this league. Maybe next year buddy, but thanks for giving me the glimmer of hope of making the playoffs.
Never throwin' in the towel, I just used it to wipe the sweat off. I'm back in the ring to knock ya heads off. Getting this win without Julio and Matt Ryan was the first step. Next week Diggs is out, but DA GAWD still gotta push through for that opportunity at a playoff berth. I see a lot of sceptics and doubters but DA GAWD is smart, he knows that ya'll just a bunch of dreamers with broken hearts. Time to dig deep and finish this season strong.
One more week down and two teams are stuck with two wins. Some teams are three wins away from a playoff berth with only three weeks left in the regular season. In reality, its only a battle for those last four playoffs spots since last place is nursing a five game losing streak while first place is on a six game win streak. Some teams waited seven weeks to have their studs play and first place already has eight wins on the season. Let's recap week nine to figure out the math of winner and losers.
Samuel L-5 Jackson 99.50 vs Los Lobos 142.90
Reesie, there's not much to recap other than the inevitable loss we all saw coming. Last place is starting to look good on you, only if it offers the rest of the league the comedy it truly deserves. After trading away Dhop for Zeke, it looks like things didn't get much better - as expected. Sure Dhop didnt't show up, but that's an anomaly. Zeke putting together subpar performances has been the trend. And just like Zeke, you've been trending down for five game straight. Just make sure you got your money ready for all those bets you made while in despair. You're now in last place AND last in points.
Lobos, congratulations on pulling yourself out of the trenches. You finally got that Brees monkey off your back and don't have to worry about starting the wrong QB. Everyone showed up to play and this was an easy win on Sunday. Now I'm not trying to jinx you, but TE might start to be your new nemesis in the start em/sit em mental anguish that you go through on Sundays. For now, enjoy the win now that you've transferred the status of last point to Reesie.
A Team Has No Name 100.35 vs It's Gonna Ertz 130.00
Jesus, it looks like Reesie had a trojan horse wrapped up in that trade. In some cosmic way, he transferred his inability to get a win/points to you. At some point on Sunday, I'm sure you wondered if Dhop was hurt but it just wasn't the case. Dhop came to your own city and didn't deliver. To add insult to injury, Justin Jackson left the game on the first drive and he got hurt not even touching the ball. So sad in a week where you traded away Zeke. I hope you had fun sitting at the cool table with your playoff contention friends because they might leave you alone come Week 13.
Trav, congrats on staying alive this week when it felt like the league was conspiring against you with that ridiculous trade. With your back against the wall, you started the only players you could and got blessed with a victory. Its amazing how much your dynamic duo props up your team. If you asked me a year ago if a team could win a game starting Randall Cobb, Wayne Gallman, and Nyheim Hines, I would've thought you never played fantasy football to ask such a silly question. In 2020 anything's possible. Good win.
Easy Drake Oven 114.25 vs Green Eggs and SAM 148.10
Josh Allen single-handedly accounted for almost half of your points Shorty. I'm sure you're panicked now that Theilen is an afterthought in the Cook led Vikings. Your love of former Steelers also accounted for less than 10 points combined. Even with Kenyan Drake coming back, it's looking really doubtful that you'll be scoring over 120 points in a game for the rest of the season. In the meantime, you might want to take a page out the DA Good Book and start John Brown to matchup with your stud QB, otherwise you could be in danger of taking that second loser tax spot. You've been warned.
Eddie, I have to commend you for keeping this hodge-podge roster together after losing Dak and Sanders. For several weeks, you've been riding the highs and lows of your team and still managing to stay playoff relevant. Maybe that split from Hector worked out for the better. He might have siphoned off your energy like a parasitic twin, but you've still got enough left in the tank to keep fighting. Congrats on the win.
falseProfits 121.35 vs Philp on my Chubb 123.75
Tough way to lose Adam. After finally getting Michael Thomas back in the lineup, it still wasn't enough to compensate for Gage not delivering in the Calvin Ridley absence. Just take solace in the idea that you'll eventually place with a lineup of healthy players. The squad has real potential, but its just not delivering when it matters most. Don't beat yourself up about the idea that you could've won if you started Josh Kelley, somehow Quis would've used a trophy power to steal this victory.
Quis, you've been dodging bullet at after bullet all season. Your Rb's go down and you have another ready to go. Your QB puts up a dud and you have just enough to squeak out a 2 point win. Maybe you're destined to seal a playoff berth, but winning another chip is a stretch. Keep enjoying these wins while you can. I see you're saving that extra budget for the playoff push player that will undoubtedly be on the waivers. Between you and me, I hope you get him and puts up a dud as soon as you have to start em.
This Team Iz America 140.40 vs KamaraPandemic 157.35
Don't beat yourself up about this one Gordon. This was David vs Goliath and no one expected you to be within reach of this game. Had you started McKissic, you would have triumphed by less than a point and sent Juan spiraling to the point of sacrificing his dog to secure the trophy. Now I know TE is a scarce position, but I'm scratching my head at the decision to start Trey Burton. The Colts use 40 TE's any given week and choosing Trey had to be desperation or panic. Dust yourself off and try again for next week when you try to get out of the loser tax bracket.
Juan, yet again, that santeria blessing is still in effect. Do you even worry anymore about your start em sit em in this league on Sunday? Do you even research the countless blogs and research that analysts put together? Or do you simply close your eyes, and move your finger around your phone and go make breakfast? I'm getting tired of seeing players on your roster that would otherwise be garbage come through with double digit points every week. Have mercy on our souls when you get bit by the Gerald curse in the semi's.
ShutTheBucUP 178.85 vs DA GAWD 116.70
Another week, another highest point total led by none other than Dalvin Cook. I bet you're really feeling yourself this season. In a week where Da GAWD needed Aaron Rodgers to ball out, he plays against him. For weeks, the Patriots have been complete trash and you manage to start the ONE guy that can manage to do damage. This is a new low for DA GAWD when he's getting trounced by the likes of you Hector. At some point, this crazy train is going to come to a stop, but until then, keep going. I guess you eventually have to win in this league, otherwise, why would you come back each year and donate. Good win.
This week didn't really change the standings too much so Da GAWD ain't really sweating. Three more weeks and three more wins puts Da GAWD in the playoffs. Maybe DJ Moore starts a late season run while Derrick Henry gets poppin at the same time. All I'll need is one solid TE and the rest could be history.
Week 8 has shown me the disparity that exists in the league. Its rare that we're having games decided by 10 points or less. Games pretty much blowouts. The result is that you either didn't start the right practice squad player or your players that are studs don't get focused on so much that they simply can't shine like they should - unless they're on Juan or Hector's squad. Let's review where we stand as the league's separation became greater.
'I Am Sam' 67.50 vs This Team Iz America 155.00
What a pitiful performance during the Gerald Bowl. After talking shit for weeks like you were above him, he came through and knocked you out Tank Davis style. Better yet, you're like the dude that was in the stands that pointed and laughed at Ron Artest until he jumped in the stands. Going into this game, I really wasn't sure what would happen. But when your defense gave Gordon points, it was a wrap. When you picked up TY Hilton this week and started him over Mecole Hardman, you were in desperation mode - while you only had 1 player on a bye. I know you're trying to make your team better, but its like you're too slow to realize what better means. You're losing focus and can't tell when to just take the loss and live to fight another day. But as you implied while defending yourself yesterday, maybe we just don't know what we're talking about. Be careful in last place, it'll mess with your head.
Look at this. Putting together a 2 game win streak while stepping on Gerald's dead corpse to climb out the grave of last place. Mahomes alone accounted for 2/3 of Gerald's points, so I'm sure you were able to kick your feet up at 4pm and tend to other things. There's still a lot of work to be done, but it looks like you're catching the wind at the right time with CMC's return around the corner. Who's laughing at Corey Davis now right? Keep up this level of effort and your days in last place will be a distant memory. Great win and establishing who the real Gerald is.
falseProfits 100.10 vs Kamaravirus 149.40
I think we both know that you were destined to lose going into this week. That cuban blessing Juan put on his lineup had you feeling beat the second that Curtis Samuel scored his first TD on Thursday night. But you prepared for this. You squirreled away some early wins without Ekeler and MT so that you could absorb such a loss. That's what the true GM's do. With many other options on a bye, this is as good as you could've expected. But from here on out, you're gonna have to get crafty, because you'll have some viable options and start em/sit em decisions are going to make or break your team. Be prepared.
I'll be the first to say that we can upgrade your name to KamaraPandemic. It's been so long since you've lost that I forgot who you even lost to. At this point, I'm starting to just take notes of who's in your lineup for DFS and just throw em in there. Curtis Samuel getting two fucking TD's while I have DJ Moore and Robby Anderson in several leagues getting no love. Hunter Renfrow catching dumb TDs. Your lineup makes ZERO sense and it manages to have a weekly floor of 150 pts. I just want to be within earshot if you get knocked out the playoffs. I want to see the look on your dog's face as he watches a single tear fall down your cheek. Until then, keep handling your light work.
Green eggs and SAM 104.60 vs Philip on my Chubb 136.45
The bad luck bug is really starting to attach itself to you Eddie and I can see why Hector asked for that separation. A lot of your players have been affected by others on their own team. No Dak means poor Ceedee Lamb production and the addition of Bell is cutting into CEH work. I was also gonna make fun of the Agholor start but looking at the game log, it did make sense. I mean, why wouldn't he continue on that upward trend? What really hurts is Mike Williams being on the bench with a solid 21 and Engram with a solid 12 that would've won you the matchup no matter what Quis did. Its like as soon as you start these guys, they fail. Guess these are the breaks. Let's see if you can claw and crawl your way to the playoffs.
On the flip side of the poor unfortunate souls, Quis is getting lucky each week with solid production from players while waiting on others to get healthy. Davante Adams scoring on 3 of his 7 catches seems Fuller-esque and his RBs are still chuggin along with double digit outings. Idk how long either of your old QBs hold up, but for now, you're poised for a strong playoff berth. I want to say I can't wait til CMC comes back, but you've got enough Rbs in the stable to shuffle around. Good win.
Easy Drake Burnt in the Oven 101.50 vs ShuTheBUCup 180.35
This game was over by Dalvin Cook's 3rd TD. You had to have lost hope for any of your players to potentially give you that many competing points. After making your trade, it just didn't matter how much better your team could potentially be. This was a sad loss, but I'm damn sure happy about it because we're still tied for wins. Maybe Thielen decides to go off next week while the Vikings give Cook a rest or maybe Robby Anderson gets back to his former glory. Until then, its time to stop yawning and start going after those wins.
You trying to prove a point out here Hector? With another highest point total of the week, it looks like we must've pissed you off with all these seasons of losses in the playoffs. Despite lacking production from your TE, you've been putting together monster games from players like Tyler Boyd and resurrected Keenan Allen. You used to have flames next to your team name for no reason but now its finally fitting. With a newly added Lockette while dumping off the crowded WR core in the Bucs, it looks like you're making the chess move necessary for a name on the chip. Let's see if you can pull it off.
Los Lobos 107.10 vs A Team Has No Name 117.85
Reduced to starting Baker Mayfield huh? I get it. These losses and that point total has you feeling like your dick got kicked inside yourself and you don't trust yourself to start Drew Brees right? You start em, he duds. You sit em, he makes you look silly. To add insult to injury, you pick up Zach Moss this week only to bench him with 20 points. And taking the gamble of starting two TE's instead of a RB in the flex? Yikes. Those two start, and you win the matchup and climb out of last in points. Now I know you have a long history of not knowing when to start Drew Brees, but at some point, you're gonna have to trust yourself and use the force. You're acting like the front office of the Chargers in 06 and you'll wish you chose Brees and a chip. Fix the decision process or you'll miss your chance at a playoff berth.
When are Golladay and Godwin gonna deliver in the same week right? At least you got a win this week despite having true studs. Now that I look deeper in this matchup, it looks like you and Ian made a bet to figure out who would win while starting two TE's over having a RB in the flex. Looks like you came out on top since Jared Cook delivered. Too many Cooks went off this week and you benefited. Now personally, I'd like to root for you, but I'm sure you gotta fall in order for DA GAWD to get into the playoffs. So until, keep enjoying these spike weeks. Who knows, maybe you'll be gifted with some unforeseen blessing of a fantasy rookie asking to take away the pain of Zeke. Only time will tell.
It's Gonna Ertz 142.85 vs DA GAWD 96.95
Looks like that trifecta came back with a vengeance after Metcalf was overlooked the week before. Wilson and Metcalf alone accounted for almost 80% of Da GAWD's points and I knew it was coming. From the moment DJ Moore was overlooked regularly on Thursday Night's game, it was a wrap. This was just the type of win you needed after sliding for a few weeks. Maybe a Carson comeback and Claypool back on the right track can give you just enough to beat your opponent next week. I guess I should say good win....
And there you have it. DA GAWD came up well short of a win this week. Its not even like there were a lot of players on a bye. This was just some underperformers underperforming when I needed them the most. Harrison Bryant was a stretch when Jared Cook was still sitting out there but the positive of JK Dobbins getting that work sets up for a good comeback week. I think I've come to realize I like when they count me out....makes it that much sweeter when I start countin' up.
What another exciting week to recap. We had some more injuries that shook up some established teams while other teams performed miracles. We're at the halfway point of the regular season and its time to get serious about your futures. You can either go up or go down. Choose wisely.
Los Lobos 112.40 vs This Team Got a Win 133.30
Lobos, your pattern of choosing the wrong QB caught up to you in the worst way this week. Killa Cam killed you. Lemonhead, you ended up dead. His insignificant .8 points vs Brees' 26 was literally the difference between winning and losing. You probably could've dropped him mid-game and got an early replacement for next week. Outside of that mistake, you put together a solid lineup. But couldas and shouldas don't change the fact that you're last in points. If there was ever a week to get back on track it was this one. Better start making your computer pute, and research a way to right this ship.
With your back against the wall, you managed to get your first win before the Jets. This is a pivotal moment in your fantasy season Gordon. These are the turnback moments where you can either go forward towards a playoff push or stay in the doldrums of fantasy hell. This is that moment. You're on the cusp of getting CMC back, but you're still in last place and it won't be easy to contend for the playoffs. I'm gonna let Steve Harvey inspire you for the rest of the season with this speech below. Take this win as your first step towards the greatest turnaround in fantasy history.
Itz Gonna Ertz 116.10 vs Easy Drake Oven 141.35
This was sad to watch for you Trav. The trifecta was in full effect in the beginning of Sunday night, and then slowly they let you down. First Chris Carson decided to leave the game and got vultured for a TD by Carlos Hyde. Then to make matters worse, the cornerstone of your trifecta decided to throw the ball A LOT to your opponent's WR Tyler Lockett. It must've made you sick when you realized the highlight play of your WR is playing defense. I hate to tell you, but you're starting to build momentum like a snowball down these standings because you play DA GAWD next. Its a tough October playa.
Shorty, you finally caught a break. After weeks of misadventures, you finally let someone else know what it feels like to lose disastrously. Tyler Lockette single-handedly resurrected your team while it sat dead in the water. That type of performance makes me think you cried out on your knees on Sunday night to Gawd/me. You promised that you'd burn all your terrible towels and send an apology letter to AB and Bell just for the chance to get this win. It's a good feeling when you come back from the dead. Count your blessings and great win. We love the drama.
Green Eggs and SAM 121.60 vs Kamaravirus 125.25
This one must've hurt pretty bad Eddie. Despite your best efforts, Juan still squeaked out a win. That loss of Dak is now having ripple effects on your mental capacity. Somehow you thought a Dak-less WR3 CeeDee lamb was better than WR2 Cooper Kupp at home. But I gotta give you credit because you turned trash into treasure with Boston Scott and Geo Bernard. But this shit ship is sinking faster than you can dump out the water. Each time you think you get ahead, you lose another player. You've now lost Dak, OBJ, and missed out on Miles Sanders this week. I don't know what else you can do now but pray that you can hold on as you race to the playoffs.
I don't know what santeria type of rituals you been performing Juan, but you've now put together an optimal lineup for several weeks in a row. You've been rotating shitty QBs in and getting 20 points. When players under-perform, you manage to play a more inept GM. There's nothing bad to say about this. You're simply winning and quietly doing so. I'm guessing you won't sit on these laurels because you know it can be taken away at any minute. Until then, keep being a happy dad on Sunday nights and loving husband on Monday. You're having a great season and no one can take that away from you until Week 13. Congrats.
Samuel Lamer Jackson 130.05 vs falseProfits 166.80
You ran into the wrong one this week Gerald. I thought you started off the week well by starting Carson Wentz while Lamar was on a bye week. But by Sunday, I think you realized how bad your team is at RB, Dhop and Cooper can only take you so far, and Cole Beasely is only reliable while John Brown is out. Not that it would've mattered but you even started Humphries over Landry. Must be those middle of the night diaper changes getting to you. You're now faced with death itself in Gordon next week. Don't lose or you may be the one trying to outrun that loser tax. Good thing you got that new job. Oh and good looks on dropping AJ Green, I needed that.
Adam, you have silently thrust yourself comfortably into 2nd place without Michael Thomas or Austin Ekeler. You out here lighting up the charts without a record deal. With a strong showing from Kyler Murray, you are officially a threat to reckon with for the playoff push. I'm starting to see the confidence growing, since you even posted a great vid in the chat. You managed to flash kick Gordon all the way down to 11th place and land perfectly poised for the next few games. I'm happy that the next time I play you, you'll be without Kyler Murray. Until then, keep knocking down the people that stand in my way for a playoff spot.
Philip on my Chubb 147.25 vs ShuTheBUCup 189.35
Wasn't it just last week that you were laughing at Shorty for being able to beat just about anyone but faced the highest scoring team that week? You might be the only person across leagues to LOSE while having Davante Adams and Tom Brady this week. But what really hit hard were those injuries at RB. With Mostert sent to IR and Mixon out, you had to put all your marbles in on -0.10 points Jerrick Mckinnon. Despite all that, you still had a great week. You better hope Mixon gets healthy and Mike Davis sabotages CMC's usage, otherwise you're gonna have to holla at Gordon for a trade. This repeat of a chip is starting to look shaky and I don't think you can stay comfortably confident.
Stop the presses, but it looks like Hector has detached from Eddie and gotten the highest points of the week TWICE. This onslaught of points was found at every position. What's crazy is that he could've had 10 more points if he started J-Herb (he doesn't have a nickname yet, so we're gonna see what happens). The biggest stand out was the 24 points from the KC defense. Who needs to worry about Bell getting the rock when the defense does more damage. Great win this week as it sets you up as 1 game behind first. Now the key is to keep that lead and dominate your opponents each week - so don't blow it. (or at least wait til I play you).
A Team Has No Name 132.45 vs DA GAWD 141.90
I just want to thank you Jesus. We had ourselves a good matchup that came down to the wire because you sat Joe Burrow with 42 points. You're love of Watson blinded you to the idea that divisional games tend to bring out the best in players. Such a noble effort with a healthy squad. Your moment in the sun should've felt like the scene in the last Matrix when they fly the ship above the clouds and see the sun for the first time ever and then fall back down into the depth of the robot wasteland. Now its time for you to fall back with Godwin gone and Elliot lacking Dak. But like I said, thanks for allowing me to see another day with another win. Couldn't have done it without you. (the link below is the sample for this week's title track. If it don't open, just skip to 4:21, its just for you Jesus)
DA GAWD has now put together back to back wins as he climbs out the depths of the standings. For weeks, I watched teams steadily get wins while I dumpster dove for 'free' waiver players that ya'll looked over. I don't get the credit I deserve for coming back but ya'll gonna see it in my words. It just feels so good to be here in the playoff hunt. It feels so good to be alive and be a threat to ya'll fantasy championship dreams.
